On this week’s episode of the Northern Power Women podcast, we’ve got life lessons from Amanda Oluwapelumi Adeola. Amanda is a Partner and Solicitor-Advocate at BHP Law in Darlington, where she specialises in private family law. She is a firm advocate for diversity and inclusion, and mentoring. In her life lessons, Amanda shared with us the lessons she’s learnt throughout her life, all the way from presentation techniques, to coping with the working parent guilt factor. We caught up with Amanda to hear more about her life lessons, how to make space for dedicated family time, keeping failure in perspective, and how to shift your thought process around rejection.
In one of her life lessons, Amanda spoke of how she copes with the guilt factor as a working parent by reminding herself that the commitment to her career is ultimately driven by wanting to achieve for her family. In and amongst her busy work schedule, Amanda has some recommendations for ensuring that time spent with your children is quality time, free of distractions and intrusions from work. Amanda chooses activities that engage everyone in the family, allowing them to be present with one another. She says, “I appreciate that chores need to be done, but involve your family in whatever you are doing. If it is food shopping, then go together, the conversations we have when we are shopping are so engaging and I learn so much from my children in that time. Putting the shopping away, learning to fold the laundry turns into a laughing session, watching a movie and discussing what we have learnt from it. Remember that all your family wants is your time, and providing you are with them and not being distracted, you are doing the best that you can”.
Later in the episode, Amanda also spoke of the initial disappointment she felt with her university results, but ultimately how she was able to rely on her strong support network to get her to where she is today. In this current season of academic deadlines, assignments and exams, Amanda extends her advice to all those who might be waiting on results, and experiencing the same feelings that Amanda did after leaving university. “Remember that you have done your best and whatever happens, it is not the end of the world”. Urging students to keep the knock-backs in perspective, Amanda wishes to remind people that “not getting the grades you want is not a failure, and I wish someone had told me that”. In order to overcome this disappointment, her advice is simple: “remain resolute regardless and keep forging ahead. Also do not forget that grades do not determine your future, your future is in your own hands and it is up to you to pursue your goals so keep going”.
This resolute determination to focus on her future destination, and not on her mistakes or failures, was something that Amanda learned from her parents. She spoke of how “my parents were a very huge part of the change in my perception. They always say that what is meant for me will never pass me by”. This mantra is something that Amanda still firmly believes. Whenever she does receive a rejection, she is reminded of these words and knows “that it was not the right place for me in any event, to move on and keep seeking the right place that will align with who I am and my purpose”.